9-25-11

9-25-11

This morning I had an amazing vision clarification of my public speaking mission and how it fits into my family mission.  It is truly amazing that as we put the Lord first ALL things fall in line.  I am so humbled and grateful.

Tonight as I was doing some reading, I felt overwhelmed, insignificant and was beating myself up.  How do I feel the desire to do better without berating myself for not doing good enough?  In some ways I feel comfortable and at peace that sometimes the dark dot voices are at bay.  I realize this gives me the responsibility to move forward and do great good in the Kingdom.  My mind is somewhat under a cycle of low level thinking where solutions are not evident.  I am so much looking forward to Kirk’s seminar in Nov to help me get my head straight.  I feel deeply that my education with Kirk and Leslie will help me fulfill the vision that has gradually been coming into focus and I saw clearly this morning.

These cycles of up’s and down’s are somewhat perplexing to me, but I have learned at least a little not to fight them and just continue to do the best I can with what I have, at least for the time being. 

I realized yesterday that I have been trying to write the wrong book.  There is a more effective way to teach the Garden School lessons, and that book was way too explanatory and not exploratory.  I think the living lessons will be the best way to allow the Spirit to teach, but I’m not sure it is duplicatable…